Martin Koss – thinking out loud…

When you go to social channels like Facebook and twitter, if you look at a group of men and a group of women who all do the same thing, write similar content, distribute similar content and display similar Tweets and Status updates – the women seem to attract more fans, have more friends and be followed more.

Why is that?
Are women taking over the whole “social media” thing? Well, no – in fact – they already did.

According to some statistics (most of why we all take with a pinch of salt), 57% of Facebook and Twitter users are women, a massive 66% of ‘broadcasters’ on uStream are women, MySpace: 64% are women, Flickr 55%… You get the idea.

In fact – I just read that 84% of social networking sites have more women than men using them and contributing to them.

Are men being totally shoved aside in this new ‘social web’ that we are all a ‘connected’ part of?

And if this is the case – Why is that?

Well – you want my two-pence worth? Sure you do – don’t you? Well – I know I’m a man so some of you may have dropped off by now and gone looking for some nice honey or some babe in a semi-poonygraphic video on YouTube – but for those who are still reading – here’s what I think:

Women are more trusted.

Notice I did not say ‘trust-worthy’ or ‘honest’ or ‘transparent’ – while there are some women who use methods and tactics perfected by men, generally women are more transparent and honest but my key word here is “trusted”… We have a natural tendency to trust a woman rather than trust a man.

You look around the web and who heads up most of the scams? Who is behind most of the over-rated, over-hyped, over-advertised BS? Well, while this is not always the case – most are led by men. Most are written by men and most of the bull-sh!tters out there are – come on guys lets be honest – yep – men.

But does that mean women are totally honest?

Nope. Not at all.

There’s honest people and dishonest people on both sides of the sexy fence but I think women can get away with slightly grey areas better than men – because we trust women.

If you see a male driven ad you’ll instantly tend to think “yeah right – here’s another con-man trying to get me to pull the plastic out of my wallet” while if it portrays a woman, a woman’s touch, we would tend to lean in the direction of “hmmm – this looks interesting” and the feminine touch makes us all warm and fuzzy inside – like Mummy is telling us something and we always trust Mummy – whereas Dad will say pretty much anything so long as he can get back to the computer or the TV (just messin’ guys).

Why do you think so many guys have Twitter and Facebook accounts with dolly birds as the pic and a fake name? Why do so many websites depict a sexy receptionist rather than the beer-bellied bald old fart that really runs the business?

3 reasons:

1. Sex sells
2. Men know this, and
3. Men have mastered the art of faking it.

Men know that women look better – more pleasing on the eye to men and to a lot of women, they also will admit that most women sound better – softer, gently, easier on the ear. But, and here’s a big ‘but’… most men have failed to grasp that women have something far more powerful than all the BS men can throw together, and that, simply, is – other women.

Birds of a Feather Flock Together.

Women stick together while men put a vast supply of their energy into compete with each other.

- Women support each other
- Women vouch for each other
- Women talk about each other
- Women talk with each other
- Women get to know each other

Women just know how to look after and nurture things.

They know how to look after the home, the family, the lives off everyone around them – they are damn good organisers and great at keeping everything ticking over without getting wound up like most men do – they have an ability to breeze through while men would be puling hair out…

It’s no surprise to see women as key members of committees and communities because they tend to genuinely care before they look for some way to walk away with our hard earned cash.

Maybe I need to learn how to use the washing machine and the darn dishwasher because, lets face it, if the new web is all about communicating, interacting and leading without selling, without being greedy and bullish – there’s only one way its gonna work guys and we can learn a lot from this…

It’s the women who will lead the way.

Perhaps its because women got involved on the web as a side issue – something to do while hubby was at work and while he needed to earn the bacon a lot of women were not setting out to earn a living – it just occurred to them that they could and eventually realised that there was a massive potential.

Men are after the gold at the end of the rainbow while the women were becoming the community. Men often try too hard – throw themselves at potential customers and use every trick in the book to get people to buy from them. Women, on the other hand, come across helpful and kind – not looking for the fast buck – most of the time.

While we can debate who is better (men or women) at leadership, business, etc., until the cows come home but – certainly as far as the new ‘social web’ is concerned (and IMHO) women have the edge.

Women are natural communicators! Rather than advertising, marketing, bullsh!tting and scamming their way ahead in this world – they communicate their way ahead and they do it extremely well.

So perhaps that is why it is no surprise to see much of the new ‘social web’ being led by women – and maybe that’s a good thing cos us blokes would probably pull out more hair, compete like cats and dogs against one another, try too hard to get the money, rush into everything like a bull in a china shop and generally cock the whole thing up.

So come on guys – let’s learn from the ladies…

stop trying to master the perfect 27 page sales letter and start learning from the women in our lives –

- learn to be social
- learn to be genuine
- master the art of being sincere
- become interested
- become a part of the discussions
- become a valued member of the community
- be REAL.